Do you feel lost when it comes to knowing how to attract men? Maybe you have tried unsuccessfully to learn what attracts a man. Perhaps you are attracting guys, but they just are not the type of man that you need in your life. Are you tired of only attracting losers?
We hear this all too often; a sexy, successful woman only seems to attract the wrong kind of guy. She may have fun dating him for a while. He may seem like an awesome catch. Before long, however, she is hearing the words, “I’m not looking for a relationship.” Or “I’m just not ready for commitment.” And it happens over and over again.
After a while, she starts to wonder why he lost interest. If this is you, you may have asked yourself, “What am I doing wrong? Why does no one want me?” The answers are simple. You aren’t doing anything wrong, and there are guys out there who would want you. You just have to learn how to attract the right guy, and how to know when he’s just not that into you.
But how can you get the right one to notice you? Men can be very difficult to read. While you do not want to play games in order to get the right man to want you, it is important to learn what attracts a man to a woman. There are ways that you can get his attention and get him to focus his energy on you. Here is a list of the best advice and tips for how to sexually attract men.
1. How to Attract a Guy with a Smile
According to the Today Show, one way to draw his attention and make him notice you is by smiling. Your smile is one of the first ways that you can make someone notice you and see meeting you as a pleasant experience. A genuine smile is one of the top things on every list of what attracts guys.
It is important that the smile be real, however. A fake smile will not only fail to attract a man to a woman but will also push him the other way. Tina Tessina, who wrote “How to Be Happy Partners: Working it Out Together,” says that one way to encourage a real smile is to go to places where you feel happy, where men just happen to be. A woman who is having a good time, relaxed and wearing a genuine smile will be noticed by a man every time.
2. Wear Self-Confidence Like a Badge to Attract a Man
Another suggestion in our list of how to sexually attract men is to learn to be self-confident and show it. If you are miserable with yourself, then a man will sense that there is a reason not to be attracted to you. Most men are attracted to women who are happy and confident enough to do well on their own, instead of needing a man to come in and fill some desperate need for validation.
If you just aren’t feeling self-confident, perhaps you should work on that before exploring how to attract a guy. Focus on your best attributes and what you can bring to a relationship. Remind yourself daily how amazing you are and what makes you unique.
Work on anything that you don’t like about your appearance. Getting a makeover, a new hairstyle, or new clothes can help boost your self-esteem. Eating healthy and staying active can also help you keep a positive attitude.
You also need to remember to smile when meeting new people. While you may feel nervous on the inside, it is important to remember that most people do. Although to you, others may look very confident and not-at-all shy, they are most likely just as shaky on the inside as you are. This is definitely one of those, “fake-it-till-you-make-it” situations. Practice exuding confidence and it will become more natural to you.
3. Comparing Yourself to Other Women is not How to Attract Men
Another way to show your self-confidence is by not comparing yourself to other women. While doing this can be a natural instinct, it is important to resist the urge to compare yourself to anyone else, especially other women and especially to him.
Never say to yourself, “If only I had hair like hers,” or “Why can’t I be smart like him,” or “If I just had her figure, I could get a man.” When you do this, you limit yourself on what you are capable of and you tell your subconscious that you don’t deserve what the other person has. The subconscious is a powerful thing and can actually work against you attracting the man that you need in your life.
Comparing yourself to other women inside your own mind can take detrimental tolls on that self-confidence that we just talked about. You will start to believe that you are not pretty enough, smart enough, sexy enough to know how to attract a man.
When you compare yourself out loud to a man that you are attracted to, you are telling him that you don’t feel that you deserve happiness or the attention you want from him. He will start to compare you to other women as well, and that is never a good thing.
4. Being Comfortable is Part of How to Attract a Guy
Women are bombarded all of the time with suggestions on what to wear, how to act, where to go, and what to do to attract a man. We find ourselves wearing the most uncomfortable clothes, walking in shoes that are killing our feet, acting silly and helpless, and going to places where we do not feel comfortable. This is how we attract the wrong guys into our lives.
When we fake everything in our lives to attract someone, the person we lure in is not attracted to our true selves. They are attracted to the fake person that we pretended to be. That means that the guy whose attention you caught is the kind of guy who would be perfect for the woman who you were pretending to be, but not so much for the real you. This is how we end up attracting Mister Wrong and never finding Mister Right.
You also exude self-confidence when you are comfortable. Now, I would not advise going to a fancy restaurant in your yoga pants and a sweatshirt, but wear something sexy that you are comfortable in, not what the latest women’s magazine says you have to wear. Let what you wear, where you go, and how you act all be according to what makes you feel comfortable and don’t ever be pushed into doing something that you are not comfortable with.
5. Asking for Help Can Attract a Man
As we mentioned earlier, acting helpless is not a good way to attract a man or to build self-confidence. But, when there is something that you truly could use some help with, asking him for help can attract a man. Men like to feel needed, and this is one way that you can fill that need for him without losing your independence as a woman.
People tease a lot about having a man open jars for you, or change your tire, or pump gas in your car. But there is some sense in asking him for help with some of the things that are harder for us to do. It does not make you less of a woman to let a man open a jar of pickles. But it makes him feel like more of a man, and this is a good thing.
6. Materialism is not What Attracts a Man
Hanging around with your girlfriends, you may find that you all name drop on occasion. When a friend compliments you on your new dress, you may respond by thanking them and dropping the name of the designer. While that may impress your girlfriends, it will not impress most guys.
What a man hears when you brag about wearing the latest clothes, going to the coolest hangout, dining in the most expensive restaurants, is that you are too interested in material things. Guys can be insecure, too, and when they become afraid that you don’t really want them but are interested in money and status, they will run the other way.
If you don’t want to set off his materialism radar, deflect such compliments. If he tells you how sexy you look in your new dress, thank him and then give him a compliment as well. After all, while social media may make it look cute for women to be “high maintenance,” men aren’t especially drawn to it.
7. Being Clingy Does Not Attract Men
While it is true that a man needs to feel needed, there is a line between needing him and being needy. It is okay to ask him to open the jars for you, or even let him open doors for you, but don’t start acting as if you cannot breathe without him. No man wants a clingy woman.
Sure, you might love spending time with him, but it is important to maintain your own identity and do things that are for yourself as well. You don’t have to spend every waking moment with him. That is not what men really want in a woman. Men want a woman who is fine all alone but enjoys being with him as well.
You can show him that this is you by spending time without him doing the things that you enjoy. Don’t sit at home all alone with a bottle of wine and a tub of ice cream every time he is out with the boys. Go out yourself. Let him see that you are perfectly capable of enjoying life alone or with him. If a man sees that you can be independent but still need him from time to time, he will feel more attracted to you.
8. Staying on Your Phone is not What Attracts a Man to a Woman
You will not attract a man if you spend your every waking moment with your head down looking at Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, or a ton of other social media distractions. Imagine this; you are in a club checking your emails and a gorgeous guy walks by. You didn’t even see him!
You were so focused on your phone that you didn’t even see the man as he entered the club and walked right by you. You missed that chance for a first impression, but maybe there is still hope. He sees you sitting there, glued to your phone, and he concludes that you are too busy to approach. Instead, he buys another woman a drink. Even if he thinks that you are drop-dead gorgeous, he isn’t likely to approach you while you are buried in your smartphone.
It is even worse if you are on a date with him. Keeping your eyes on your phone instead of him will make him feel as though you aren’t interested in him at all. Once a man’s ego takes a hit like that, he will not want to be around whoever made him feel insecure or unwanted. He may wonder if you are talking to some other guy. He may feel that your friends mean more to you than this date. Or he may just feel that you are rude, but chances are, he won’t be attracted to you.
9. Being a Tease Might be How to Sexually Attract a Man
If you are a woman, you have likely heard the words, “Don’t be a tease,” all through your adult life. We are taught not to tease a guy, as in don’t make him want something that you don’t plan to give him. This is honestly really good advice. But sometimes, being a tease is exactly what attracts a man to a woman.
This does not mean that you should go out and being overly flirty and tease a man in a way that makes him feel frustrated and eventually angry. But, being a bit flirty, taunting him sexually, and leaving him guessing what else you have to offer is a good example of how to sexually attract a man. Men love a challenge, so giving him something to strive for will keep him interested.
In fact, he will likely be thinking of you long after you have gone your separate ways if you tease him just a bit. Don’t show too much skin, but just enough to get his imagination going. You might laugh while looking him in the eyes and touching his arm. Toss your hair and smile at him. Give him your full attention and he will be drawn to you.
10. Showing Interest in Him is How to Attract a Guy
Let’s face it, guys love to have their egos stroked, and what better way to do this than by giving him all of your attention? Make eye contact with him often, smiling when it is appropriate. Lean in towards him when he speaks, to show you are interested in what he has to say. All of these will show your interest.
As we said above, when he compliments you, thank him and offer him a compliment as well. Ask him about himself. What type of work does he do? What are his interests? What is his favorite sports team? Drink? Food? Listen to what he says and comment on it. Let him know that this is not all about you, but him as well.
When a man sees that you are interested in what he has to say, he will usually open up and share things with you. His eyes will often show what he is passionate about. Do they light up when he talks about sports? Or maybe he is into cooking? Whatever his interests are, he will want to spend his time with someone who shares them.
Those are just some of the examples of how to attract a man. The most important one, as cliché as it may sound, is to just be yourself. As we said, if you send a fake you out to meet a guy, you will meet one who is interested in the person that you are pretending to be, not in the real you. When the real you comes out, as it eventually will, he will likely leave, and you will feel rejected and abandoned.
This happens all of the time and women think that they have attracted the “wrong” man. The truth is, the man was attracted to someone who did not exist. You did not attract a man who would be interested in who you really are. Be yourself, let the real, amazing, wonderful, sexy, funny, smart you shine through and not only will you attract a man, but you will attract the man who is right for you.