Most people agree that self-confidence is a crucial prerequisite to success. Not just success with women and dating – although that’s certainly one major benefit – but success in the world of business, friendships, and life in general.
Unfortunately, for the most part, you can’t “fake” self-confidence, it’s something that you develop as you improve various facets of your life, such as your appearance. If you try too hard, or just seem unnatural, people will definitely catch on pretty quickly.
That said, there are a few tricks that can be used to successfully convey a sense of confidence. As an added benefit, putting these techniques to use will also gradually increase your own self-esteem. If you’re dedicated and really work at it, you’ll notice yourself really beginning to believe that you can be successful, which is how true self-confidence is developed.
1. Use correct body posture.
This is a very, very important method of conveying confidence. Many expert “pick up artists” choose to teach their students body posture before anything else because it immediately indicates a man’s confidence level.
Body posture is more than just sitting up straight. It means standing tall, with your stomach in and chest out. Don’t over-exaggerate this, just make sure you’re not slumped over and letting your stomach droop to the floor.
Your shoulders should be back slightly, and your head up. Many people have a subconscious slump that not only takes at least a half inch off their height, but it also makes them look timid and uncertain.
Alpha males walk with their heads held high, they shake hands with a firm grip, and they speak loudly and with authority. You want to be seen as an alpha male.
By doing all of these things correctly – and be careful not to go overboard – you will notice that people pay more attention when you speak, and tend to be more likely to stare at you as you enter a room. Women will almost certainly gravitate towards you if you’re oozing with confidence.
Over time this conscious attempt to convey confidence will turn into genuine self-confidence. By the time that happens, you won’t need to “pretend” to be confident, because your self-esteem will have skyrocketed.
2. Buy clothes that only someone who is confident in their sense of fashion would wear.
By this I am referring to wearing clothes that are a bit edgy, trendy, or different.
You’ll need to be careful with this one, because choosing the wrong clothes can look downright awful. The trick is to find clothes that are both socially acceptable but also stylish and unique.
As an example, let’s say you work in an office environment. Everyone is used to seeing you wear a white shirt, blue blazer, and bland khaki pants.
Something “edgy” and trendy for this setting might be a dark purple shirt and a silver tie. Or better yet, how about a light-colored gray pinstripe suit with a white shirt, light green skinny tie, and a silver tie bar?
Even for weekends and casual occasions, you can still portray a sense of confidence with your fashion choice. One great way to start is by going into a favorite store and identifying a clothing item you think is trendy and cool, but that you would never own yourself. There’s usually plenty of these in every store – maybe it’s a hat, a belt, sunglasses, etc..
Now, instead of saying “I don’t think I would look good in that,” try it on. Ask a friend, a store employee, or even a stranger what they think. You’d probably be surprised at what can look good on you.
Do this a few times and you’ll end up with a wardrobe that’s trendier, edgier, and conveys a stronger sense of confidence. Wear these items regularly, and your confidence actually will improve.
This article is written by Brad Browning. He is a breakup and divorce coach and a best-selling author.