Perhaps, at some time in your life, you’ve wondered, “What’s a guy mean when he says a woman is high maintenance?” What exactly gives a man the impression that you are high maintenance, and what does a woman do to be considered high maintenance?
According to the Urban Dictionary, the high maintenance woman, “Has higher than normal expectations; has a greater requirement for affection or attention; has more needs and/or demands and therefore more difficult or challenging. Doesn't equate to money or material possessions alone but may be needy in emotional attention and affection; picky, bratty, likes things her way, takes pride in her appearance, finicky. Usually, very well put together and usually independent therefore requiring a lot out of a man to keep up with her.”
But is this a good thing or a bad thing? What’s a guy mean by, “She’s high maintenance?”
Does He Mean You’re Too High Maintenance?
An article in Muscle and Fitness explains how a man can gauge whether or not a woman is too high maintenance. In their report, if a woman raises too many of the high maintenance red flags, a guy should just move on… here are some of those red flags:
- She is too obsessed with her appearance – If a woman is more worried about her looks than enjoying her time with a guy, then she may be too high-maintenance according to this article.
- She is too needy – the report states, “You want her to need you and want you but if she has no life apart from you, she will suck you dry.”
- Mommy issues – if her mother controls her too deeply, a woman can be too high maintenance.
- Perpetual victim mentality – If a woman is always the victim in all of her stories there may be a problem with high maintenance.
- Molehills into mountains - a woman who is too high maintenance will make every little issue into a huge catastrophe.
- Too clingy – women whom men see as too high maintenance won’t allow their men to be independent of them.
- Complain, complain, complain – a whiney woman is considered to be too high maintenance.
- Selfish user – if she only chooses her friends according to who she can use and who is too eager to please her, she may be a selfish user and entirely too high maintenance, according to the report.
- She makes scapegoats – if she constantly blames someone else anytime something goes wrong, or worse, always makes it the man’s fault no matter what, she may be too high maintenance.
- No apologies – if the woman can never admit that she was wrong and offer an apology, she could be too high maintenance.
When High Maintenance is a Good Thing
Although there are obviously many reasons that a man can think a woman is too high maintenance, there are also many good points to being high maintenance. For example, when a high maintenance woman walks into the room, all eyes will be on her. For a man, this can be quite stimulating, having everyone envy what he has!
High maintenance women also tend to know where all of the best places are. When it comes to fine dining, no one can guide you better than the pampered, high maintenance woman. Of course, men will be expected not to skimp on price in those cases, but the food and experience will be to die for. In fact, high maintenance women tend to need money in order to be happy. But, if she is willing to work for it just as hard as the man, isn’t this a good thing?
The high maintenance woman also tends to splurge on the best skin care products, the finest clothing, and the brightest bling. All of these can make her quite attractive to the man who has the confidence to stand in the limelight with her. In most cases, the high maintenance women will look as if she just walked out of a salon anytime that you see her. This is a great way to have instant sex appeal.
High Maintenance Women Want the Best
One thing that can make men cringe at the thought of a high maintenance woman is the fact that she expects the best of everything, and that includes her choice of man. In fact, some high maintenance women can be quite snobbish, almost always acting as if they are better than the man that they are with. For the less-than-secure guy, this can keep him on a constant struggle to measure up.
For these women, everything in their world must be perfect all of the time, and when it isn’t, they often blame their men. This man is expected to “fix” everything that goes wrong and bear the wrath of their woman in the meantime. They want to be treated like a queen, but the key is, this only works out good for the man if he is also treated like a king. Treating him like a king will make you more attractive to any guy you meet.
On the other hand, the high maintenance woman’s strong desire to have only the best could help the man who loves her become the best version possible of himself. She is more likely to push him to dress better, speak, better, eat better, work out more, fight for that better position at work, and so much more. While it can be difficult to keep up with the high maintenance woman, it can also be like having their own personal coach … in almost every area of their lives.
Overall, it is not always a bad thing to be a high maintenance woman. While men often are drawn to their beautiful appearance and exquisite tastes, they can be pushed away by the very characteristics that attracted them in the first place. It seems the key is this: men don’t mind a woman who is high maintenance, as long as she is willing to put contribute in putting in the work and time needed in order to make this happen, and she doesn’t expect him to provide all of the luxuries she wants without her help.